SEX ADDICTION COUNSELING | ONLINE | LOS ANGELES COUNTY & VENTURA COUNTY
It’s time to change from constant self-loathing & shame to new possibilities in your life.
What is Sex Addiction?
Sexual addiction is a pattern of unwanted, compulsive sexual fantasies and behaviors that wreak havoc on a person’s life. No matter how the addiction began, clients report an ever-increasing preoccupation with pornography, online affairs, strip clubs, prostitutes, online sexual behaviors, massage parlors, adult bookstores, and other compulsive sexual behavior.
Out-of-control sexually addictive behavior escalates to the point where fantasizing, pursuing, and engaging in these behaviors take over one’s life, frequently resulting in relationship problems, legal woes, trouble at work or in school, financial difficulties, decline in mental and physical health, and more.
Sex addiction is a term now widely used to describe patterns of compulsive, out-of-control sexual behavior. Our sex addiction therapy specialists can help you determine your unhealthy sexual behavior, whether they meet the clinical threshold of addiction or not, and support you in making and sustaining positive changes in your life.
What does sex addiction look like?
If you think you might be a sex addict, chances are you have struggled with one or more of the following behaviors:
Compulsive masturbation
Repeated and compulsive use of pornography
Sexting and cybersex activities (e.g., compulsive webcam sex, sexting, and sexualized chat)
Anonymous or casual sex, often facilitated by apps or hookup websites
Numerous affairs or a pattern of one-night stands or brief “serial” relationships, usually facilitated by apps or dating websites
Use of sensual massage for sexual purposes
Frequenting strip clubs, adult bookstores, and other environments focused on sex, including online environments (e.g., virtual reality games and chat sites)
Engaging in prostitution (hiring or providing)
Pursuing sexual encounters without considering the negative consequences
Leading a “double life,” keeping your sexual behaviors secret
Sexual Addiction & Shame
Sex addicts often feel intense shame about their compulsive sexual urges, fantasies, and behaviors, so much so that they frequently try to limit them or eliminate them completely.
They’ll tell themselves, “This is the last time that I will . . .” but in their inability to control their behaviors (loss of control is characteristic of all addictions), they ultimately return to the same destructive sexual patterns, deepening their despair and shame.
How Sexual Addiction Intensifies
Sometimes, the addiction escalates so that the person is sexual in ways that violate their values and beliefs (e.g., safe sex, relational or marital fidelity, not harming others, and spiritual values).
Such breaches of the person’s values only exacerbate his or her shame and lead a double life, keeping their sexual fantasies and behaviors hidden from loved ones and friends. As the addiction intensifies and the person spends more and more time fantasizing about, seeking, and engaging in the next sexual encounter, managing the two lives becomes increasingly untenable and beyond the person’s control.
Hope Is Possible
If you resonate with this, you are not alone. If you’re ready to change your life, if you’ve had enough of the deadening shame, the self-loathing, legal and financial troubles, spiritual emptiness, depression, anxiety, other mental health problems, and shattered relationships, a way forward is possible. We specialize in helping clients recover from sex addiction and in supporting their betrayed partners. If you or a loved one are struggling with sex addiction in some way and are ready to re-engineer your life, we can help you with our treatment for sex addiction.
Using focused, proven tools in a confidential environment, our team can walk with you step-by-step toward your healing and recovery. We will collaborate with you in building the life that you want and help you restore balance to your life and trust in your relationships with your loved ones. Hope is possible when you’re not alone.
THERAPY TO OVERCOME SEX ADDICTION
The Answer Is Connection
Sex addiction often has its roots in unresolved pain resulting from emotional, physical, or sexual trauma. The pain is worsened by their shame as they often blame themselves for the emotional wounds that still fester inside them. As emotional intimacy involves feeling free to be oneself in the presence of another, addicted persons find it impossible to intimately connect with someone else. As a result, sex and emotional intimacy aren’t even in the same zip code. Instead, the person learns to deal with unresolved pain by using sex and sexual behavior in ways that have nothing to do with intimacy.
Recovery starts with stopping problematic sexual behaviors and finding ways to reduce the chaos that accompanies sex addiction. However, because sex addiction is fundamentally a problem with intimacy, long-term healing must include emotional transformation that makes being in open, genuine relationships possible. We have training that enables us to do the “depth work” of the emotional transformation that can occur, helping our clients connect and, at last, be their true selves with another person while we treat sex addiction.
I Need Help with Sex Addiction—What Should I Do Now?
Starting sex addiction therapy and counseling can be tough because sex addiction is often embarrassing and difficult to talk about. Reaching out to seek treatment for your sexual urges is nothing to be ashamed of and can lead to a lifetime of sexual and mental health, and we applaud your courage in seeking the support you need. And trust us—we know how you’re feeling and can journey with you through the discomfort, emotional pain, and awkwardness.
If you’re ready to begin, please call us at (805) 256-3497 or email hello@centerforintegrativechange.com to schedule your initial sexual addiction session. It would be our privilege to meet with you and for us to discuss how we can help you.
Treatment for Sex Addiction & Counseling That Works
We’re a team of therapists specializing in the treatment for sex addiction, which means that we have received specific training and supervision to help sex addicts and their partners discover healing and lasting change. Supported by a growing body of research and proven clinical tools, the CSAT (Certified Sex Addiction Therapist) training is quickly becoming the field’s standard for all therapists working with individuals who suffer from addictive and compulsive sexual behaviors.
We also have training in contemporary psychoanalysis in trauma, addiction, couple and family relationships, mental health, shame, and other areas critical to long-term healing and change.
After you’ve regained a sense of stability and control in your life, understanding unconscious patterns of being in relationship and managing your feelings are paramount. You will learn to relate to and manage your feelings without the use of compulsive sexual urges, behaviors, and fantasies that you may have used to “numb” yourself as an avoidance technique for overwhelming and painful feelings.
The time to get help is now.
Drug, alcohol, and sexual addiction counseling can be difficult to start, usually because you might be afraid of judgment or are wondering if harm reduction is the right approach. We applaud your courage in seeking the support you need. No matter what your circumstances may be, no matter how desperate your situation, change is possible.